Rabbi's Column - October 2017

What in the world could the Holy One have been thinking to pack FOUR major holidays into one month! Nevertheless, we Jews have been indefatigable in celebrating just those holidays: Rosh Hashanah, Yom Kippur, Sukkot, and Simchat Torah. As I write these words, we are still in anticipation of Rosh Hashanah. But by the time you read them, Yom Kippur will be over. The Book of Life will have been opened, our own lives reviewed, and the new chapters are just beginning.

That is where Sukkot and Simchat Torah come in. How wonderful to celebrate Sukkot, out on the TBT deck, in our wondrous Sukkah, set up by the Men’s Club and decorated by our Nursery
School & Religious School children. Sukkot reminds us of the beauty of nature and of its fragility. We are still post-hurricanes and continue to be awed if not overwhelmed by the ferocious power of wind and rain. (And no, it’s not too late to donate to the cause - my favorite one being NECHAMA, A Jewish Response to Disaster. You can give at nechama.fundraise.org).

Every year at Simchat Torah, the unfurling of the Torah scroll throughout the congregation is an awe-inspiring wonder to behold. We end the Torah and we begin again. Simchat Torah
marks the conclusion to our season of new beginnings. We celebrate a new year at Rosh Hashanah, a new opportunity at Yom Kippur, a new harvest at Sukkot, and a new cycle of Torah at Simchat Torah.

Endings and beginnings. The order of these words is significant because it is indeed a cycle that we are celebrating.

Moadim L’Simcha - May the holidays still ahead of us be filled
with joy.
Rabbi Offner

Rabbi's Column - September 2017

I am in my seat at the Metropolitan Opera House. The majestic crystal chandeliers start their rise into the sky. The spotlight reveals an elegantly attired conductor. The house falls silent, he lifts his baton, the orchestra begins. The music goes straight to my heart; I am enraptured by my favorite moment, the overture.

Selichot is the overture for our High Holidays. You don’t want to miss it. It is a truly breathtaking service. This year, with Mishkan HaLev, the new prayer book for Elul and Selichot, we can soar in spirit and reflection, in ways that are contemporary and traditionial.
The High Holiday season is somber and the work we do is heavy. How refreshing then to begin our overture with Mishkan HaLev, which works because it is rooted in joy and celebrates the opportunities the season offers us to change our lives. The name of the book itself - Mishkan HaLev - not only promises a connection to the other Mishkan prayers books in our lives, but also a focus on the heart - a joyful heart.

Yehuda Amichai’s beautiful poetry appears throughout the book, tying together both the ancient and the modern with timely, meaningful messages that are neither moralistic nor pedantic. One poem, “The Place Where We Are Right,” demonstrates this theme:

From the place where we are right
Flowers will never grow
In the spring.
The place where we are right
Is hard and trampled
Like a yard.
But doubts and loves
Dig up the world
Like a mole, a plow.
And a whisper will be heard in the place
Where the ruined
House once stood.

Mishkan HaLev helps open our hearts to the tasks at hand. I look forward to seeing you at Selichot Services on Saturday, September 16th at 7pm, when the new book will be in our hands as we open the gates of 5778.
L’Shanah Tovah Tikateivu,
Rabbi Stacy K. Offner

Rabbi's Column - Summer 2017

Dear Friends -

The months of July and August are upon us and we are going to take advantage of these summer days with some special opportunities here at TBT.

First, I want to thank everyone who responded to my query about 6pm summer services. I was astounded by the enthusiasm that was registered by so many of you. Here is a smattering of responses so you get a taste:

"I like the earlier time for senior citizens."

"We might actually make it there with the kids if it was earlier. We like the idea!"

"We would prefer a 6pm start time."

"Our family would like 6:00pm summer services."

"Sounds like a great idea to me."

"Sounds good to me!"

Nevertheless, I was sobered by the responses from those who prefer
the 7:15pm service: "We would be unable to come."

"I prefer the services at 7:15."

"I am on a late schedule, so 6:00 seems rather early to me."

So what should we do? If this were a strictly democratic process, the answer would be easy. There were 91% in favor; 9% against. But the idea that moving the service to 6pm might preclude households from ever coming gives us pause. Then again, there were those who said that the 7:15pm service was too late for their family and precluded them from coming.

We wrestled with these issues at the Religious Activities Committee. We reminded ourselves that no decision has to be forever. We don't want to be afraid to try something new. We are speaking specifically about six services {3 in July and 3 in August) that would be impacted by the change. Our September through June schedule of First Fridays at 6pm and all other Fridays at 7:15pm still stands.

So...yes! We are moving to ALL 6pm services this July/August. All services at TBT will begin in the front hall with a "Pre- Neg" and the first prayers of Kabbalat Shabbat. At 6:20pm, we will move together into the sanctuary to complete our service. First Fridays will end at 7pm and others by 7:15pm so you can plan a leisurely Shabbat dinner following services.

 One more thing! Unsolicited by the poll, several of you also wrote "Don't forget Beach Shabbat!" Our July 7th service will be ON THE BEACH at East Wharf at 6pm, followed by an Oneg, hosted once again {with our great appreciation!) by Lisa & Eric Rich at their home which is around the corner from the beach. You can also note that our "Shabbat Under the Stars" Shindig will be on the TBT deck on Friday, August 25.

 Here's to a wonderful summer of Shabbat Services,

L'Shalom!
Rabbi Offner

Rabbi's Column - June 2017

Editor’s Note: These remarks were first shared on the occasion of TBT’s 40th Annual Meeting.

On September 2, 1971, there was a short article in the Shoreline Times that changed the lives of each one of us. The article was headlined: "Jewish Congregation." The article read:

The Shoreline Jewish Community Congregation will meet at the Grove School dining

room on Friday, September 10th at 8pm. Those who have not been contacted may

call Mrs. Barbara Sklaire for further information.

Thus Temple Beth Tikvah was born. 46 years ago. Six years later, land was purchased and a building was constructed. This building. It wasn’t a given.

The founders - our founders - didn’t have a map with precise instructions. Should we build a building? Maybe we should just buy books. Bricks or books? Given the choice, I would choose books every time.

But maybe it is not simply a choice. Maybe we need the bricks to house the books. We need the building to house the people. We need a sanctuary that God might dwell amongst us.

I confess: looking back over this past year, there are moments when it doesn’t feel like God is present. Moments of strife. Moments of challenge. Moments of administrivia.

The holiest moments are so clear: when we filled this sanctuary to over-flowing for Rosh HaShanah and Yom Kippur. When we built our Sukkah out on our deck and packed the deck for services. When we had one of our largest Passover seders on record and filled this Social Hall with Pesach spirit and matza balls.

But God doesn’t need holidays to join us. Every time we have the opportunity to say hello to someone we haven’t met before, God is present. When we try new ideas, like our Jewish Mindfulness and Meditation practice, God is present. When we bring MahJongg into the library on Friday afternoons, God is present.

Our Religious School boasts over 100 children, our Sunday morning Tefillah is robust with singing and prayer. Our Nursery School children spell L-O-V-E with every smile. Our staff cares for each other and cares for you in ways beyond measure.

Bricks or Books? Building or People? A little 3-letter-word helps us answer the question. The word is A-N-D. Bricks AND Books. Building AND People.

We hope to care for our building by making it more welcoming, more inclusive, more accessible, and lighter, warmer, and more open.

Most important of all, remember that it only matters to the extent that we, the people, become more welcoming, more inclusive, more accessible, and lighter, warmer, and more open. I believe that we have grown in all of these attributes over the past year, and I hope we will continue the trend in the year ahead.

L'Shalom,
Rabbi Offner

Rabbi's Column - May 2017

Dear Friends,

We are in the season of counting the Omer. We do lots of counting in our lives. We count the days until vacation. We count the years of our lives by marking birthdays and anniversaries. We count our money to make sure we have enough to pay our bills. We count the Omer to make a connection between the freedom that became ours at Passover and the 10 Commandments that we will receive on Shavuot.

How do we count from freedom to responsibility? An ‘omer’ is actually a measure of grain and traditionally the counting of the omer was a harvest activity. The counting of the omer has become more of a spiritual practice today. Counting is itself an act of consciousness-raising. There are 49 days between Passover and Shavuot, making a precise 7 weeks of 7 days. Each week of counting is guided by a spiritual principle. The seven principles are: loving, kindness, justice/discipline, endurance, humility, bonding/connection, and leadership.

The rabbis believe that every human being is comprised of these seven basic principles. They also believed that all forms of enslavement, at root, come from a distortion of these principles. None of us is perfect and therefore we are all ‘slaves’ to something. By focusing with intention on each of these principles, we can strive to free ourselves from those imperfections that enslave us.

We are counting the days now until the celebration of our 40th anniversary here at TBT. Our celebration takes place during the 5th week of the Omer when we reflect upon building and connection. How perfect that our attention is drawn to that which truly makes TBT strong. It is not the building itself but the bonds and connections made between the people who comprise TBT that makes us strong.

We will celebrate those connections in wonderful ways over the course of the weekend of May 12th and 13th. At Friday night services on May 12th, Rabbi Hesch Sommer will be our guest speaker. Rabbi Sommer was TBT’s rabbi for 26 years, from 1982-2008. He will offer his reflections on the history of TBT from his unique vantage point.

Our Saturday evening celebration fittingly falls not only during the counting of the Omer, but precisely on "Lag BaOmer," a holiday celebrated on the 33rd day of the counting of the Omer. Modern Jewish tradition links the holiday of Lag BaOmer to the Bar Kokhaba Revolt against the Roman Empire. Lag BaOmer is celebrated as a symbol of the strength of the Jewish spirit. So too the strength of TBT’s spirit is such that it grows stronger each day as we evolve to meet the needs of today’s Jewish community and to dream about tomorrow’s.

I am excited to celebrate with you on May 12th and May 13th as we reflect upon our past, dream about our future, and celebrate our present.

L'Shalom!
Rabbi Offner

Rabbi's Column - April 2017

Dear Friends,

There is a post that has been spreading on Facebook that I find particularly poignant. So poignant, that I want to share a piece of the message with you here. The point of the message is that the world is complicated and as political intransigence leads more to black and white ‘sides,’ we need reminders that no one is, thinks, or does strictly ‘black’ or ‘white.’

In fact, we can be neither all black nor all white. Even more, we can be both black and white at the same time. As the anonymous Facebook message reminds us:

For all you who aren’t sure, it is possible to be gay and Christian. It is also possible to believe in God and science. It is possible to be pro-choice and anti-abortion.

It is equally possible to be a feminist and love and respect men. It’s possible to have privilege and be discriminated against, to be poor and have a rich life, to not have a job and still have money.

It is possible to believe in sensible gun control legislation and still believe in one’s right to defend one’s self, family, and property. It is possibleto be anti-war and pro-military.

It is possible to love they neighbor and despise his actions. It is possible to advocate Black Lives Matter and still be pro-police. It is possible to not have an education and be brilliant. It is possible to be Muslim and also suffer at the hands of terrorists. It is possible to be a non-American fighting for the American dream.

Then there is Linda Sarsour who has yet to learn this important lesson. For those of you who don’t know, Linda Sarsour was one of the organizers for the Women’s March on Washington on January 21st. Linda Sarsour is a feminist and a Palestinian. Linda Sarsour also, in a very crude and philosophically deceitful statement, has made the claim that you cannot be both a feminist and a Zionist. Excuse me? Linda Sarsour has just denied the existence of almost every Jewish woman I know.

We must shout out very clearly that some of the best feminists in the world are Zionists, and some of the best Zionists in the world are feminists.

Because I do believe that we are all complicated packages of what can sometimes appear as contradictions, I must also point out that the same Linda Sarsour was behind the Muslim raising of funds to repair the Jewish cemetery in St. Louis that was viciously desecrated. I am appreciative of that action. But we cannot allow it to temper our disgust at the claim that Zionism and feminism are mutually exclusive.

It is equally possible to appreciate Linda Sarsour’s concern about anti-Semitism in St. Louis and to deplore her own anti-Semitic claims about Zionism and feminism. Deplore them we do.

L'Shalom,
Rabbi Offner

Rabbi's Column - March 2017

Dear Friends -

I will be attending the annual convention of the Central Conference of American Rabbis this March in Atlanta. Some of you may be aware of this annual outing; others may be hearing about it for the first time. Let me share with you that being together with 500 rabbinic colleagues is a treat for the spirit.

The CCAR Convention is an opportunity to enhance professional skills and study Torah. It is also an opportunity to spend time with treasured friends. After all, a CCAR Convention is simultaneously a professional conference AND a college reunion. Add to that the fact that we all share deep Jewish values and practices and community and you have a recipe for a meaningful four days.

This year, our convention will focus specifically on "Being a Rabbi in Turbulent Times." We do indeed live in turbulent times and this year we will come together to address some of the most pressing issues of our day: the rise of anti-Semitism, the political landscape at home and in Israel, the tragedy that is Syria, the refugee crisis, and racism in America.

In addition to grappling with tough issues, we come together for prayer every day (not on Shabbat, however -- as Rabbis, we all have to be home for Shabbat!).

I feel so blessed to be a Rabbi and to be the Rabbi of Temple Beth Tikvah, where we can come together as a community to look at our lives through the lens of being Jews and foucs on the intersection of Judaism and ethics. Nothing replenishes me for that holy task more than our annual CCAR Convention. Being in Atlanta this year gives us the extra opportunity to focus specifically on Civil Rights and Atlanta’s own heritage in that realm.

I will be at the CCAR Convention March 19-22. I look forward to sharing a report from CCAR with all of you upon my return at Shabbat Services on March 31st.

L'Shalom,
Rabbi Offner

Rabbi's Column - February 2017

Dear Friends,

I do not know what "went into the water" this February, but we have an extraordinary - and wonderful "problem" of having a year’s worth of wonderful events that are all taking place in the span of one

February week. We have fully FOUR all-congregational events between February 5th and February 12th. Each event is announced in the pages of this Shofar, but I want to take the opportunity to highlight each one of them for you so you can take full advantage.

We begin on Sunday, February 5th, with an opportunity to interact with one of the hottest items in New York City today. Due to the fortunate coincidence of having an ‘in’ via temple member Rosemary Baggish, we have been able to arrange to have Liz Alpern appear here at TBT. Liz is the renowned author of The Gefilte Manifesto, which is a cookbook dedicated to taking old world Jewish foods and making them into contemporary dishes. The event will come with mimosas and samplings of recipes that will be cooked by TBT members. A fantastic way to spend a Sunday morning!

"Phone call for you," the office said, and I picked up the phone. On the other end of the line was Judy Diamondstein, the Executive Director of Federation, asking if TBT would like to host JJ Goldberg and Jonathan Tobin for a special event. "Are you kidding me?!?!?!" I asked incredulously. JJ Goldberg and Jonathan Tobin are two of the brightest thinkers around when it comes to parsing the thorny issue of the Israeli-Palestinian conflict. JJ Goldberg is the editor-at-large of Forward, and Jonathan Tobin is an editor and chief political blogger of Commentary Magazine. Getting both of them in the same room at the same time??? They have opposing viewpoints??? How fascinating and refreshing to hear them engage together. Yes! We will host them, on Thursday evening, February 9th.

I am already out of breath, but Friday evening, February 10th is Shabbat Shirah, and how could we not come together to celebrate a most breathtaking musical evening? Cantor Margolius and Cantor Dorothy Goldberg are hard at work planning a fantastic evening which will include guest musicians - and the premier of a piece created by Dorothy. If that wasn’t enough: we will also take the opportunity to celebrate the return of our Sephardic Torah Scroll to our sanctuary after months of repair work that was done by our visiting Soferet last Spring. The Scroll was first given to TBT by Sam & Mary Blank, of beloved memory, and now it will live again as we rededicate it on this evening.

One last spectacular event: our entire greater New Haven Jewish community is coming together on Sunday, February 12th, to honor the 6th yarzheit of singer/songwriter Debbie Friedman. We will convene at the central location of the Towers in New Haven, and the concert will be in absolute Debbie fashion. Debbie was never satisfied with performing and hearing her own voice alone. A concert wasn’t a success until she got everyone in the room singing. And that is just what we will do on February 12th.

So please: Food, Israel, Shabbat, and Song. It is going to be a packed month of very special moments. What a February.

L'Shalom
Rabbi Offner

Rabbi's Column - January 2017

Dear Friends,
The Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King’s words continue to instruct:
Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that.
Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.

It is our job to focus on the light and love; our job to create light and to reach out in love. That is why I am thrilled to participate in a Hartmann Institute conference on Martin Luther King Day on "Jews and Muslims in America Today: Political Challenges and Moral Opportunitiees." Notable speakers include Representative Keith Ellison from Minnesota, the first elected Muslim to serve in the U.S. House of Representatives, and Jeffrey Goldberg, the Editor-in-Chief of the Atlantic. It is much easier to talk about the needed friendship between Jews and Muslims than it is to engage. Engage we will as we religious leaders seize the opportunity to sit in a room filled with Jews and Muslims, to focus on the moral obligations and political challenges that face our communities today.

The month of January also means a new president for our country. Donald Trump will become President Trump on January 20th. I wish him every success. May he have the wisdom and the courage to lead and guide our country in a way that improves the lives of us all, most notable the poor and disenfranchised; may he usher in an era that strengthens our country and the entire world.

The day after the inauguration I will be in Washington, D.C., participating in the Women’s March on Washington. Nancy and I will be there together to encourage our President and all our governmental leaders to champion women’s values, values that coincide with Reform Jewish values: equal rights, equal pay, and equal dignity, equal access to quality health care, including the right to make that most critical of personal health decisions regarding abortion.

As we venture into this new era of American life, we are guided once again by the words of Dr. Martin Luther King:

The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.

I implore each of us to stand always on the side of justice and of truth.

L'Shalom
Rabbi Stacy K. Offner

Rabbi's Column - December 2016

Dear Friends,

Chanukah is a wondrous holiday in its simplicity. We light candles and gaze upon the light. We add one more candle each day, increasing the light, the beauty, and the joy. While those candles are burning low we need to pause for a moment to remember why it is we light those candles. Some 2,000 years ago a King reigned in Syria who took control of the land of Israel. He insisted that the Jewish people observe the Greco-Syrian customs of the day. He denied us the right to practice our own religion. He went even further and made sure that our holiest space in the world would be desecrated. Pigs were sacrificed on the altar in an effort to destroy not only the Temple, but the spirit of the Jews.

Instead, it did just the opposite. It enflamed the Jews. It returned us to our core. The Maccabean

rebellion went on for three years, after which time they returned to the Temple, cleaned and refurbished it, and rededicated it to Jewish life.

It is for this act of rededication that the holiday of Chanukah was named. "Chanukah" means "to dedicate."

Rededicating Jewish holy space is what we will be focusing on this year at TBT. We hope to have our own "Springtime Chanukah" when we rededicate our own Temple on our 40th Anniversary in May.

Looking forward to celebrating Chanukah with you and reflecting on the dedication of the Jewish people and the rededication of TBT.

L'Shalom,
Rabbi Stacy K. Offner